Review: First Love Languages

First Love Language by Stefany Valentine
My rating: 3.5 of 5 stars

SPOILERS AHEAD

A heartfelt coming-of-age story about a girl still reeling from the loss of her father and missing a connection to her biological mom and her Taiwanese heritage. You can tell that Catie’s yearning for family connection was something the author truly felt, and how much losing her first language, Mandarin, affected her after moving to the US after her parents’ divorce. This would be a great book for someone who is looking to connect with their heritage or someone who is trying to find themself as they grow and learn about what’s truly important to them to live a happy life.

This book was a little difficult for me to read at times, because Catie was kind of all over the place - worried about moving, about finding her bio family, about hurting her adoptive mom, about her job, about Toby, about learning Mandarin, about the stupid lies she was telling. I get it, it’s a lot to deal with. But I wanted to sit her down and say, “Just be HONEST with people.” I guess that’s what she eventually learned; I just wanted her to do it faster, haha.

There were a few elements I didn’t love as well. I’m not a fan of the book The Five Love Languages, and I’m not sure I would have picked this to read if I had known it would be such a focus. I appreciate Catie mentioning her dad had updated parts that were outdated in his copy, but he clearly valued it. Maybe that’s because of his Mormon heritage? I also didn’t love how much the Mormon church played a role in this book, but I would guess that’s an integral part of the author’s story, as well, and why it had to be included. I appreciate that Catie’s family has taken a step back from it, and it was nice to see some queer representation with Mavis, Alex, and others.

The other part I wasn’t sold on was Toby and Catie’s relationship, but that’s possibly because they seem so young to be professing love for one another. They clearly like hanging out and are drawn to one another, each finding the other very attractive, as well as good company. I get why Catie was nervous to tell Toby the truth about her non-existent boyfriend, but Toby seemed irrationally angry about it for way longer than I thought he would. And then suddenly, because he saw what Catie wrote about falling for him and admitting to the lie, he was suddenly ok with things? Seems a little too much of a switch.

Also, there are some inconsistencies with how Toby’s feelings are presented. When they are having their real first date at his house, he says, “Sorry for being too dense to see that I’ve had a crush on you since our first practice date. But I guess it took being with the wrong girl to make me realize I’d rather be with the one I love.” But like two seconds later, he says, “Ever since our first practice date, I’ve wanted to tell you that… and I’ve wanted to kiss you.” He also wrote her that letter in Mandarin the night after their almost-kiss and said, “Even though you have a boyfriend, I still fell in love with you.” So, I wish Toby’s feelings had been more consistently presented when everything was out in the open.

Regardless of the few issues I had with the book, I would definitely recommend it to those looking for a story about connecting with your biofamily, especially one overseas, dealing with the loss of a parent, and finding first love.

Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

View all my reviews