The Power

The Power by Naomi Alderman
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

SPOILERS AHEAD:

A mind-blowing, clever, and shocking story revolving around power and gender, and the effect power has on gender stereotypes and expectations. Parts of this book were extremely hard to read, because things like this actually happen around the world, but those atrocities are being perpetrated upon women, not men. When the power between men and women is flipped on its head, what comes to pass in this book is not a more gentle world, but one that is equally horrifying. Turns out, it's not his gender that gives man an incredible capacity for cruelty, it's the power he has, a power that imbibes him with invulnerability and a sense of invincibility in the face of normal checks and balances. Women are not, in fact, immune to this perversion

As the male "writer" of this "historical fiction" notes, "Gender is a shell game. What is a man? Whatever a woman isn't. What is a woman? Whatever a man is not. Tap on it and it's hollow. Look under the shells: it's not there." Gender is only important in that it signals to others where the real power lies. Women and men, deep down, are the same: wanting power, taking what they can get. Roxy and Tunde are talking towards the end, trying to make sense of all that had happened to them. "One of them says, 'Why did they do it, Nina and Darrell?' And the other answers, 'Because they could.' That is the only answer there ever is."

The men and women in this book don't truly connect with one another until the balance of power between them has been leveled. Tunde had fear slowly building in him with every female encounter, and it wasn't until he was with Roxy that he could relax and connect. Roxy who had her power stripped away by those she trusted most, had been reminded again and again that she can't trust men, but Tunde looked at her and said, Even without your Power, you are powerful. He helped her see that her identity wasn't tied to her power, but was something that couldn't ever be taken away.

One interesting this to note is that, other than at the very beginning, when Allie is noted as mixed-race, we rarely see mention of racial divide and disparity as the power structure shifts from male to female leadership and privilege. Maybe that was too many layers to include in the book, but if this was truly the way the world changed, it's not like racism would disappear overnight. You'd better believe there are just as many female racists as there are male.

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The Fifth Season

The Fifth Season by N.K. Jemisin
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

BEWARE: MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD

Amazing and complex and deeply moving. There is so much going on In this book that it's almost too hard to review it.

Finally, a book where a woman is "the chosen one," the unknown who might be able to save the world by destroying it. And she is a complicated woman, who has lived through unspeakable things like torture, reeducation, becoming a slave not in name but in treatment. Her body is not her own, her life is not her own, her future is not her own. Somehow, she manages to escape time and again, to carve out little pockets of freedom and love. Of course, those moments of happiness always end in almost more anguish and heartbreak than one can bear. Is she could have destroyed herself, she would.

There's a lot I still don't understand, and obviously this book needs the rest of its trilogy to provide answers and satisfaction. Normally that would bother me, but so much of substance happens in this book, that I can't imagine it containing more depths in itself. I'm still not sure what the relationship between the Orogenes and the obelisks is, or the relationship between the orogenes and the stone eaters. Obviously, Hoa has claimed Essun as his own (and fought off others for this privilege), just as Antimony has claimed Alabaster. At first, it seemed like this was a beneficial arrangement for the orogene in question - Antimony is the one who saved them from destruction at Allia - but now seeing him turned mostly to stone, and subsequently literally eaten away, I'm starting to wonder.

Also, I'm really pissed at Alabaster telling Syen that he'll never forgive her for killing Coru, because he TOLD her to do it, he would have done it himself, and she saved him from a miserable life of torture. Also, I'm pretty sure she was trying to kill herself, too, but was somehow protected by the obelisk, so really, she's living a lifetime of self-torture. So back off. Whatever Alabaster wants her to do with the moon, it still feels more important that she track down Jija and find Nassun, because any one who would kill his 3 year old son but abduct his 10 year old daughter instead of killing her... it creeps me out makes me suspicious. Find that girl!

I have to mention, too, I was really wary of a book that forces sexual slavery on people in the name of procreation, and if it had come from any other writer, I probably would have stopped reading right then. I decided to trust the author, though, and I'm glad I did. It's pretty clear that every decent person considers that system abhorrent, and the loving relationship we see most is between a bisexual man, his female partner, and his male partner, who live together with their child as a happy, whole family. There is also a transgender character, and others whose genders aren't clarified. Overall, the gender and sexuality expressed in this book is inclusive and normalizing, which is definitely encouraging and uplifting to read.

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Odd Thomas

Odd Thomas by Dean Koontz
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD

An inventive and creepy story about a fascinating person. I really liked Odd, and I can imagine his gift is hard to live with sometimes. Not only have to help those who have passed, but dealing with the guilt of not being able to save everyone would be overwhelming.

I'm still not sure what exactly bodachs are, and what that weird light-sucking room in Bob's house was. Maybe it really was the gateway to hell?

I'm so, so sad about Stormy. I originally thought it was unlikely she'd make it, but then, the fact that she was talking to him in the hospital tricked me, though Odd admitted he was being an unreliable narrator at that point, because he couldn't deal with Stormy's loss in addition to his injuries. She seemed to be the perfect balance to Odd, and I wonder now what will become of him. Even if he has lots of options (as his nurse friend implied), it's hard to see him trusting anyone enough to fully drop his guard and tell her his secrets.

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The Cuckoo's Calling

The Cuckoo's Calling by Robert Galbraith
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

SPOILERS AHEAD

A fun and engaging mystery. I really liked Cormoran, but Robin really steals the show! She is so clever and kind, and I love the dynamic she is building with Cormoran. I'm thrilled (but not surprised) that she'll be staying on as his secretary/assistant/student detective.

This plot was certainly twisty and turny, but by the time it got to the end, everything added up just as Cormoran said. Lula had a lot of issues, but deep down, she seemed like a sweet girl who just wanted someone to connect with, who would love her unconditionally without expecting anything from her. Jonah was exactly that person, and I'm most sad that their relationship never got a chance to grow. Also, poor Charlie.

I'm definitely going to keep reading the series, whenever I need a fun mystery.

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Dark Matter

Dark Matter by Blake Crouch
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

SPOILERS AHEAD: BEWARE!

A fascinating and suspensefully mind-bending thriller, but the heart of this story is about love, family, identity, and regret.

The science itself is intriguing, and Crouch does an excellent job explaining the quantum mechanics of it all so well that even a non-science person like me can understand. And then go, "WHOA."

My favorite parts of this book are all the introspective moments Jason1 has as he tries to make sense of who he is as a person if he's not UNIQUE in his personhood. Eventually he comes to the conclusion that one's identity isn't binary, it's multifaceted. Who you are isn't just the result of one distinct choice, it's the result ALL the choices you make and experiences you have along the way. All those other Jasons (save Jason2) started out at the same point as Jason1: being stolen from his world. Eventually, they diverged, and became distinct individuals. Daniela decides that Jason1 is the one she wants to be with because, just like the first time they met, it's incredible that they found a way to one another for a second time. Is it fate? Maybe, for these instances of these people, it is.

Regret is something we all live with to varying degrees, and it makes sense. Crouch dedicates this book "for anyone who has wondered what their life might look like at the end of the road not taken." The conclusion Jason comes to is that it's easy to look back and wonder what-if, but we have to live our lives in the moment, and be satisfied with decisions we've made. "We see it macro, like one big story, but when you're in it, it's all just day-to-day, right? And isn't that what you have to make your peace with?" When Jason2 claims he built the box to "eradicate regret," to "let you find worlds where you made the right choice," Daniela sets things straight with clarity and insight many of the Jasons lacked: "Life doesn't work that way. You live with your choices and learn. You don't cheat the system."

I thoroughly enjoyed this book, and I can't wait to recommend it to people. One of the other quotes I loved from the book was this: "We're all made of the same thing - the blown-out pieces of matter formed in the fires of dead stars." I've read this idea in many other forms over the years ("We are all made of star-stuff" comes to mind), and it always makes me feel such love and connection to my fellow humans, my family and friends. The universe is vast and mysterious, but in the end, we are all made of the same basic things, and we are more alike than we are different. As different as all the various permutations of Jason1s became, in their hearts, they all wanted the same core thing: for Daniela and Charlie to be safe and happy.

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Moon Called

Moon Called by Patricia Briggs
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

This was a fun supernatural romp, and the first in a series I'm sure I'll need to continue, if only to keep up with Mercy's adventures! I've read a lot of stuff in this genre, but I'm don't think I've read anything with Mercy's particular type of Walker in it. So I'm really curious to know more about her - family history, and what exactly her powers are. She seems to have more than she realizes, and I keep waiting for someone in her family to show up and explain things to her.

The love triangle is also fun, though it kind of annoys me a bit when the supernatural guys are so much older than the aging girls. There's something uncomfortable about the trope of the older man "teaching" the younger woman the ways of the world. I like both the guys, though, and I enjoy their interactions with Mercy. She seems strong enough to maintain her seperate relationships with both Samuel and Adam without them controlling her too much. I would say I lean more to Adam's side because he's technically younger than Mercy and I think he might actually love her. I'm not sure what Samuel's true feelings are. Plus Jesse is adorable, and she, Adam, and Mercy would make the cutest little family.

If I had one criticism, it's that the whole conspiracy plot was way too complicated, and it didn't even make that much sense in the end. Gerry was trying to trick his dad in to killing Bran, so that his dad would be happy to be a werewolf and survive? And because of that dozens of people died and wolves were made and tortured? What did he expect would happen after Bran was dead? His dad would just happily take over as Marrak? For being a smart guy, his plan was ill-conceived, and seemed purposefully confusing.

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The Handmaid's Tale

The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

SPOILERS AHEAD:

So sad, so real, and so frighteningly current, despite the fact it was written over 30 years ago. It's not hard to believe that, like Offred, we could be so easily disenfranchised and made into property. Listening to this book was truly like listening to someone tell me their story, and it made even more sense at the end when we find out that the "manuscript" of the book was "found" as a series of tapes, and placed into a patchwork order of sorts.

In the historical notes at the end, an interesting section in and of itself, it is noted about the Aunts in particular: "the best and most cost effective way to control women for reproductive and other purposes was through women themselves. For this, there were many historical precedents. In fact, no empire imposed by force or otherwise has ever been without this feature. Control of the indigenous by members of their own group. In the case of Gilead, there were many women willing to serve as Aunts, either because of a genuine belief in what they called Traditional Values, or for the benefits they might thereby acquire. When power is scarce, little of it is tempting." We continue to see this happen, throughout history and in our current times. It's only when we start to recognize it as it's happening and work to stop such oppression that true change can be made.

The historians at the end refused to judge The Gileadian society, saying it was responding to economic and societal pressures, and trying to fix things they saw as wrong, but what that said to me is they were putting what they saw as a better society above the lives of the people themselves. As the commander said: "Better never means better for everyone... It always means worse, for some." The people of Gilead became chattel to improve "society" as a whole, even though it doesn't seem as though anything was much improved - there were still things like brothels where men could do what they pleased, all state-sponsored, supervised by women.

Part of me hates how this book ends, with so many unanswered questions. Was Offred truly saved? Was Nick on her side the whole time, or was he a "Private Eye" and turned her in? Will she ever see her daughter again? What is her name? Is she pregnant? In the end, though, I have to be okay with the uncertainty, because what in this world ever has any certainty? We only have hope, and I'm going to choose to believe that Offred found freedom, somehow, somewhere, and that she has some measure of peace. I wish for her this desire she once spoke of: "I want to be held and told my name. I want to be valued, in ways that I am not; I want to be more than valuable."

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Let's Pretend This Never Happened

Let's Pretend This Never Happened: A Mostly True Memoir by Jenny Lawson
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Hilarious at times, heartbreaking at others, Jenny's (mostly true) memoir will make you laugh out loud, and then give Jenny a big hug for all she's been through. The funny moments are incredibly funny, but the sad moments are the ones that truly got to me. 💔 This woman has been through SO much in her life - miscarriages, PTSD, anxiety, rheumatoid arthritis. Sometimes it seem like she just can't catch a break. But somehow, Jenny has maintained a positive attitude and a sense of perspective and humor. Sometimes, all you can do to maintain your sanity is laugh.

Jenny and Victor's lives sound like a challenge, but it's their challenge, and they make it work. I love what Jenny says at the end: "You are defined not by life's imperfect moments, but by your reaction to them. Because there is joy in embracing - rather than running screaming from - the utter absurdity of life."

I loved what Jenny had to say about friendship, particularly with other women. I get it. It's hard to make friends, especially when you get older. But friends are the people who are going to pull you through life's tough moments, and celebrate with you when you achieve your wildest dreams. I love this one thing she said: "Girls make both wonderful and terrible friends - they actually listen to your goals, even when you're too drunk to know what you're talking about." The way my friends listen to me makes me think more about what I am saying, and that's a good thing.

I listened to the audiobook of this one, and it was amazing. Jenny reads it herself, and has the most perfect, dry delivery and comic timing that captures the essence of a Jungle Cruise guide, in the best sort of way. She also sounds a little like Mindy Kaling sometimes. Also, she sings the chapter titles. Also, there's outtakes at the end that are hilarious. If you do listen, though, you absolutely have to at least flip through a print copy of the book, because there are PICTURES.

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The Belles

The Belles by Dhonielle Clayton
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD!

A fascinating tale from a fantasy world, but one not that far removed from our own in its obsession with youth and beauty. The idea that something like plastic surgery could be done with a sort of magic is intriguing, and the possibilities are truly endless in that world, but I’m glad they left an element of pain, of reality. Nothing comes without a cost, not even if it is “magic.”

The history of the Belles is fascinating, despite the fact that much of it is shrouded in myth and mystery. I’m still entirely sure how their arcana powers work, but I’m also not sure that I’m meant to. As Camille dives deeper into her own history, we learn that things are not as she seems. Not only are the Belles not born in the traditional way, they seem to be grown from a flower bed using the blood of the former generations as the seed. By the end, we know that Camille is a clone of the queen’s favorite, Arabella, who has particularly strong blood they were perhaps trying to replicate. In the same way, there is a new baby Belle named Donna who is clearly another Arabella/Camille clone. I’m especially curious about baby Donna because, according to Valerie, the babies, who at the beginning of the book had just been born, are already 6 years old by the end, when not even 6 months had passed, I’d wager. Something seems to be extra special about the blood of these 3, based on the way Sophia reacted to using Camille’s blood in her experiments and Camille’s own unique use of the Arcana.

What Camille’s mother had desired for her was for her to help the people of Orleans love themselves, for who they are. That hope for the future is diametrically opposed to that of Sophia and her minions, who want power, and the ability to transform independent of the Belles’ work. They want to set free the power to change to the masses, but also, I’m sure, to monetize and profit from it. And worst of all, they want to use those With Belle blood as merely parts for their experiments, property they can chain up and do with what they want.

The heart of the story, which is obviously the first chapter of a series (darn it), is the attempt to wrestle control of the country and the people from a madwoman and the people who support her for their own nefarious reasons. Sophia is cruel, unconscionable, and literally insane. I’m not sure how those on her side don’t see that their time too will one day come to a painful end. One of my biggest irritations is why the Queen didn’t bring Camille to help Charlotte right when Camille said she would. How did it get to the point it did? Did Sophia already have so much power in the palace that her wishes and summons were obeyed before the Queen’s own? It’s either that, or this delay was merely a plot contrivance to get all the characters to the points they are at in the final moments of the book: Sophia as Regent Queen, the Queen dead, Charlotte “missing,” and Camille, Amber, and Rémy on the run.

Let’s talk about Auguste for a minute. I’ve read enough of these style of books to guess from the moment we meet him that he was likely to be one of the bad guys, and end up betraying Camille. I think he truly did fall in love with her, and when he tried to talk her in to running away with him, he was serious, but the second she said no, he was back to Plan A. Auguste saw that refusal as a refusal of love, and didn’t stay around to hear otherwise. Because of that, he set in motion events that have made him unforgivable, no matter how he may try to beg forgiveness one day as this series progresses. I truly hope Camille remembers how his actions, his betrayal of her, caused not only her own physical and mental pain, but that of countless others. Most damningly, it led to the death of Claudette, who didn’t deserve to die, but especially not in that way.

Meanwhile, I’m over here rooting for handsome, stoic Rémy from the moment he refused to crack a smile. Add to that his dry humor, his love and affection for his sisters, and his innate goodness, and I was a goner, even if Camille wasn’t feeling it. He was always clearly the better man, and I’m hopeful that his friendship with Camille will eventually build to love for both of them. But maybe down the road, when they’re not in mortal peril at every turn. What I’m most curious about with Rémy is what’s up with his scar, and the single freckle under his eye? Does he also have to be “fixed” every so often or he’ll go grey? The way he looks seems so distinctive and specific that it makes me extra curious about it.

I loved the stories of sisterhood in this book, of the many things they shared growing up, and the ways they are both alike and different. Amber made me mad quite frequently because, despite being a rule-follower, she was easily antagonized and turned to violence too swiftly. I wish she had been sweeter, and more understanding. The other sisters, I feel like we only got tiny slices of their stories, so I’m looking forward to getting to know them more through the series that follows.

WARNING: This book doesn’t have a definitive ending, and leaves off on a cliff hanger. Book 2 of the series doesn’t have a publish date as of yet. This was an enjoyable read, but definitely read at your own risk!



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My Favorite Thing Is Monsters, Vol. 1

My Favorite Thing Is Monsters, Vol. 1 by Emil Ferris
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Such a gorgeous, inventive, intriguing book! It book's styling made it really look like a notebook, complete with realistic-seeming paper clipped in notes. In addition to the intriguing story and characters, there were page after page of gorgeous sketch recreations of famous art. I could spend hours just looking at those.

Karen, an outcast, monster-crazed girl, becomes more and more obsessed with solving her neighbor's murder as her findings become increasingly weird. It doesn't help that she's dealing with not only bullying at school, but her mother's cancer diagnosis. The sicker Karen's mother gets, the more obsessed she becomes with Anka's story and figuring out what really happened to her. The monsters are another way to escape from reality - Karen hates herself, so she would rather be monster. Then, monsters become a way to save her mom and family - if she can turn them all into something like a vampire.

Over the course of her investigation, Karen ends up uncovering a lot of secrets, including ones she'd probably rather not know. There are too many secrets, and eventually Karen gets frustrated and blows up at her brother - in the end, hiding the truth doesn't help anyone. Karen ends up keeping some secrets of her own, though. She finally comes to terms and accepts the fact that she is gay, and tells her brother. Deeze's reaction was not what I expected - although he accepts her, he also cautions her to keep it a secret from others. Deeze seems to have more secrets than anyone. There is this big mysterious thing hanging over their past that no one will talk about - is it their brother Victor, whom Deeze somehow killed? And how was it that only Anka was "there for him" during that time?

Anka's story is both fascinating and truly heartbreaking - growing up poor and abused in Germany, then eventually escaping the WWII death camps because of her connection to child prostitution. It's a messed up story, but it was a messed up world. I can only imagine what more we're going to find of her past in the next volume.

Another character I'm curious to know more about is Karen's "friend" Sandy - that little girl that no one else could see. Who is that supposed to represent? Is she a ghost? Her hugs are cold. She's always hungry, skin and bones, lives in abandoned apartment, floats down hallway... Seems like a ghost to me, but she has to represent something.

I'm definitely looking forward to the fall when volume 2 comes out! Hopefully my questions will be answered!

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In-Between Days

In-Between Days: A Memoir About Living with Cancer by Teva Harrison
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

A simple and honest illustrated memoir of Teva's reality of living with cancer. She doesn't shy away from the hard parts, but also takes time to highlight the ways she holds on to her hope and keeps going. Just because you are dying doesn't mean you can't live. Best of all, as she says in the preface, Teva gives voice to the fears that many terminal cancer patients have and encourages them to talk to their family, friends, doctors, and other loved ones. "I've since learned that it's the unspoken that is most frightening. Shining a light on my experiences takes some of the power away from the bogeyman that is my cancer. I'm taking my power back."

On hope, she says: "Hope is a dangerous thing. It's absolutely crucial all the time, or I couldn't go on. I am a naturally optimistic person, and I am inclined to hope for the moon. But I can't put too much hope in any one thing. ...I have to find a way to balance the hope I need to get up every day the pragmatism I need to deal with bad news." So much of what Teva says resonates with me. We are of a similar age (I just turned 37), and her outlook on life and hope feels very similar to mine. It's a constant balance between hopeful optimism and the certainty of impending doom. Reading Teva's words fortifies me, and gives me strength to battle through my own struggles, small as they may be in comparison.

I particularly like what Teva had to say about prayer. As an atheist, she doesn't believe in an afterlife, as much as she tries, and so it would be understandable if she wrote off people when they offer prayers for her. "And yet," she says, "every time someone tells me that they're praying for me, I say thank you, and I mean it. I can't explain how it is that I believe that this will help or the depth of gratitude that I feel for the people who keep me in their thoughts in those personal sacred moments." As a person of faith, that gives me hope that when I tell someone I am praying for them, regardless of their personal beliefs, it means something to them and provides some level of comfort, if nothing else.

I'm so grateful Teva shared moments of her family history with us, as well. The women in her family seem remarkable, and the legacy they have left for her of strength and endurance, of doing everything you can for the world, is strikingly evident. "What is it that we leave when we go, except the impressions we've made on the people we've loved and who loved us?" Of her granny, Teva says, "her memory is a potent reminder that, big and scary as this disease can be, I'm much more than my cancer, too."

I can't say that Teva's personal art style is my favorite, but I'm also sure that doesn't actually matter in a work like this. Her words have so much power and you can feel the strength flowing through the lines of the art of each page. Each drawing holds such truth, and the catharsis that was generated through their creation shines through.

There are so many more things I could share from this book - it really is worth the hour or two of your time it would take to read it. As a final moment of note, and a good thing to remember as we live each day: "So I did what I could. That's what we all do, stumbling through each day as best we can, trying to live up to our own ideals of kindness and caring."

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